Mitchell's Mustard Blog

February 7, 2011

We Can’t Be Friends

Filed under: Just a Thought — mitchellsmustard @ 8:56 pm

Your last cigarette in the morning, not because it’s ticking on into the afternoon but because you know what’s good for you, it can only be good for you. It’s not just the thought that you’ve been smoking for over 10 years or if you jog across the road to dodge the traffic that once at the other side it feels like taking on the car would have been a better decision, it’s the pain that keeps creeping up through your chest that doesn’t disappear even if you place your fingers in your ears and hum like when you were a child. Close your eyes and pretend it isn’t there, you could run away from it but deep down you know within 5 minutes you’d be on your knees. What has your body got to do to make you realise that enough is enough? Lying on a doctor’s chair with wires stuck to your chest, wrists and ankles whilst your heart feels like it’s going to split an imaginary stitch should do it.

A year on from sitting in that chair and knowing it was time to quit, yeah I’m guilty of being weak and smoking on the odd occasion but I’m only human. Quitting smoking has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made and I recommend it, I admit that I do miss them friendly little sticks of joy but in my heart of hearts I know we just can’t be friends.

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